I have very bad luck, as evidenced by the fact that every time I try to go to the pool, it rains, and also because every man I have ever loved has not loved me, but has instead fallen in love with someone else, who is not as cool as me, although who is also probably not as self-absorbed.
I have missed this little blog. Perhaps I will start writing more.... I've had it since I first moved to San Francisco, which is a long time, and encases all, thus far, of my young adult life. Also, writing is good for me. It gets the weird stuff out of my head and somewhere else, where I don't have to worry about forgetting it but also don't have to think about it all the time. Also, it gives me a sense of camaraderie, however false. Frank Warren said something along the lines of, "All our loneliness is just an illusion," which isn't true at all. It's something you can tell yourself in those dark, suicide-y moments until the sun rises, but it's still a lie. We are nearly always alone, all the time, even when we're not. It's a rare moment to be in true community with another person. I had always thought that when you found someone you could have that with on occasion, well, that was the sort of person you should marry, but now I'm beginning to think I was all wrong about that. At least, for me anyway. Or maybe I'm just telling myself that to help convince me that it's okay to marry Atlas.
I'm babbling. I've had most of a rather large glass of cabernet sauvignon, and I'm not even sure if everything in this post is spelled right.
But I think I will start to post more.....I've been depressed, irrationally (is there any other way?), and I need.....something. And most of what I want to say isn't exactly proper to be posting on Facebook, anyway.... therefore, this blog(e).
Okay, till next time then.
